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1. |
Infinity
03:31
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Oh infinity
Do you ever weep?
Oh infinity
Never mine to keep
I love you like infinity
Never fully mine
Oh infinity
Forever gone in time
We talk about infinity like it’s somewhere we’ll reach
Like we can hold it if we just keep our minds open
Sit patiently like good little children waiting on dessert
We talk about infinity like a number
Forgetting it is a state
Forgetting it is our mere mortal way
Of numerically expressing forever
A brass globe
Bigger than the sun
Ground to dust by the wing of a dove
That flies only once a millennium
It seems so lonely
To never change
Cut down, it remains the same
Unmarked by tragedy
Even doubled, it never grows
Never weeps
Never loves
Never smiles
Untwist it, though
And it looks like nothing
There is honesty in zero
The zero is what we were before birth
The zero is what we will be again
But we will never be infinity
Our small minds cannot even grasp its meaning
So we step to it gingerly
With fire pokers
With limits to approach it
But no one really gets there
And look at our silly little lives
Infinity is just a collection of these small moments
Of endless days
Of years
Of lifetimes
Of other infinities
We talk about infinity like it’s somewhere we’ll reach
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2. |
It Doesn't Add Up
03:19
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(Mathematics is a deductive science)
They teach paradoxes
But only in the theoretical
Look, they say
A feline in a box
An experiment of slits
It doesn’t add up
Let us think on
What this teaches us
They say
But they've forgotten
All the flesh and nerve endings
They've forgotten
That where a mind finds whimsy
A belly can ache
Proofs and
Logic gates bridle
A wild, ischemic heart
Flailing to resuscitate
Amidst barbed wire
Of your freshly sharpened words
And still
I cannot solve
Cannot reconcile
Why all at once I hold
The anger of a stampede
And the wilt of an empty room
(The proof is defective
It would be better to dispense with argument altogether
Rather than bring fallacy to the rescue of common sense)
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3. |
The Equations Exist
04:56
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(Three lines of investigation: atoms, electricity, and energy had to develop and meet; we will begin with atoms)
(The atoms are vibrating with the most intense energy
While circling around like miniature solar systems
Whose complex activity is enough to bewilder the imagination)
Looking at it all from here
From the comfort of this nebula
I see now
That we may indeed be
Too late
We spin
We spin
Into oblivion
Never understanding the math
But here’s the real secret:
The equations exist
Whether we solve them or not
(The persistent determination to discover what truth really is
Irrespective of any preconceived notion of whatever source derived
The determination to think honestly for ourselves
Instead of endeavoring to get our thinking done for us)
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4. |
Imperfect Math
03:11
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I curl into a fist
Ill-placed quiet anger
Personified
Inequality of circumstance
Drifts higher with every wind
When I'm rested
I can dig again
I say into my fist
And almost believe it
Inertia is sometimes
The best resistance
And if the tipping point reaches
I can't see myself
Without a reflection
The math of people is difficult enough
When meted out
As kind advice
Everything is prime
Indivisible
But by one
And itself
I am not enough
And I curl tighter
Making the remainder
As small as possible
We
Don't want
To upset the
Balance
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5. |
Divided By Zero
03:55
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I sent a prayer
To an equation
To solve the weariness
Of living
Incalculable despair
And nightmares of 1 divided by 0
But all my moments
Have now diverged or digressed
From you
From the place I regret
I don’t have faith
In mortal love stories
Or heroic quests
To save my soul
I don’t have trust
In the code written
In my neural space
Without doubt
Without indignant hands
Of entropy and time
Squeezing nihilistic truth
From my Buddhistic light
There was a house
With a garden and a dog
There was a couch
A kitchen aroma
Fingers coiled
Dreams shared
In your blue estoile eyes
And a ring that connected
Eternal smiles and laugher
That seemed to bounce
Off all art glittered walls
Doorways to love’s
Fathomless kingdom abound
Now there’s
An old desk and lamp
An old desk where I scratched
Truths of the cosmos
And that lamp it
Flickers, dust stars, and old hopes
Across these crumbled pages
As I write
Madness
Line after line
Thinking it matters
Believing these words
Will tell my tales
When I become
This lamp and desk
When I become
An insomniac’s dream
An empty whiskey bottle
Holds more reality
Than this notebook
Torn and tattered fantasies
To escape my despair
For there are no more doorways
Than the ones to you
I wonder
Could I transcend the height I've reached
Or are my wings
As tired as my ideas?
Soon I will become
Ink
An old soul feeding the crows
Feeding Death my memories
The past, soon to be smeared
On double mirrored walls
Of dendritic worlds
Colliding
In a picturesque shadow
Of a lamp
And a lifetime
Of fear
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Iambic Beats Los Angeles, California
We have so many titles. A few of mine are: scientist, poet, writer, singer, mom. I like to think I live at the intersection of music and words and always asking questions. A goddamn lovely place to be.
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