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Distilled

from Dark Matter by Iambic Beats

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about

This is one of the first poems I ever composed music around. I wrote this as a stream of consciousness poem, and the rhythm seemed to jump out at me. I don't often write poetry that rhymes but fun internal rhyming always interests me.

With this piece, I was really exploring the ideas of addiction to a feeling (not to a person or thing), how it feels to crave a certain mindset itself. We drink in the dopamine rush and before we know it, we are needing another pour into our glasses.

lyrics

I sip you, golden, distilled

My veins pregnant with heat
As the pages burn before me
I dilate completely

Naked and raw
Hungry, in awe, I am
Everywhere and nowhere at once
Why must you

Sip me too
Your lips graze edges
That don’t exist
At least not anymore
Another pour
Always another
Ok but this is the last
And the last
And the last, and the

Vision blurs
I sentence my slurs
Filled with you
Always you
Didn’t want
Now I need

My bleed is a brain
And a reach and a fall
Clouds are animals they
Move and soak me and did you know
Rain is just salt and
Saline caries current?

The flames of the book sulk away
In the steaming rain
And I am the wet ash
Your scent masked
With petrichor
The graveyard
Of last nights downpour
The liqueur
Sprouting dahlias
From bottles and rotted pots

The flood I was
Abuzz, wet like pavement
In relentless sun
That isn’t wet at all
Just my mind non-existent as it is telling me
There’s water when I need it most

What if it’s all just
A lie within a lie
Within a ghost

Drunk mirage
Constructs of Oz of
Utopia that fell in an alternate history fable
Of Abel and Cain
Who really died from drowning in
This same sad rain
After learning their mother
Was born in a cage
Or did you skip over that page?
You say the book told it differently
But I’ve burned it
Didn’t you listen?

Remember when each letter was written in long hand?
Each sentence was a prayer for the other guy
Who prayed for the other guy
Who lost his rib
Anyway
I’m probably rambling now
Your dial tone fills my ears
But I can’t hear it anymore
On account of this raging downpour
That has started again and again
Inside my house

I sip you, golden
Distilled

credits

from Dark Matter, released June 1, 2021

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Iambic Beats Los Angeles, California

We have so many titles. A few of mine are: scientist, poet, writer, singer, mom. I like to think I live at the intersection of music and words and always asking questions. A goddamn lovely place to be.

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